She's been reading The Art of War to the puppies. Yeah, the one by Sun-tzu. Oldest military treatise in the world. THAT Art of War
So I waited for her to come back up to the library, because I had a couple of questions for her.
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Me: The Art of War? You’re reading The Art of War to the PUPPIES? Why?
K: It’s an important part of their education!
Me: Education?
K: Yeah! How else are they going to grow up to become white hot balls of canine ninja fury?
Me: … You are kidding, right?
K: No! See, little Musashi is already developing a killer instinct!
Me: Musashi? Killer instinct? They can’t even walk yet, Kumo! Their eyes aren’t even open!!
K: Ninja can kill with their eyes closed, Gage. Duh.
Me: (blinking) … Okay. And we’re not naming the puppies, Kumo.
K: You’re right. We're not. I did.
Me: We’re going to let the people who adopt the puppies name them.
K: Well, we have to have something to call them until then.
Me: No we don’t. I can’t even tell them apart.
K: Yes we DO! Without names, how will they know which one is supposed to act on my orders to kill? You can’t efficiently command a ninja army without NAMES, Gage. (shaking head)
Me: ….
In the end, it was decided that Kumo can give them their secret ninja names, but that whoever gets the puppies can name them whatever they want. And upon some consultation over the phone with Mandi, she told me (well, after she got done laughing hysterically) that reading The Art of War to the puppies wasn’t a bad thing. Ultimately it’s about getting them used to voices and having people around, and that they don’t understand what Kumo is saying (much like the rest of us) so it doesn’t really matter what she reads to them.
Which is good, since I just saw Kumo breaking out her copy of The Book of Five Rings.
Ninja puppies.
White hot balls of canine ninja fury.
Oh for crying out loud.
